Thursday, October 8, 2015

you gave me love and helped me find the sun 
and every time that i was down you would always come around
and get my feet back on the ground,,,

Sunday, May 31, 2015

Pinay DH's And The Spratlys

 In response to the article written by Mr. Chip Tsao in one Hong Kong Magazine entitled “The War At Home” a few weeks ago a satire as they say but I think it went a little too far. It’s more of an arrogance and a whole lot of ignorance. I wonder what he wrote about when the Russians killed the Chinese seamen and the Japanese planted a flag in Diàoyú Island, but when Manila claimed sovereignty over the Spratlys he tried getting back with his helpless Filipina domestic assistant Louisa by threatening her that he would not give increase on her wages next year until she [Louisa] tells her countrymen that the Spratly belongs to China, isn’t that the height of ignorance, did Mr. “Cheap” knows that an ordinary person like his assistant has nothing to do with any law, policy, treaty or decree his/her government ratifies, you don’t give benefits like salaries to anybody base on her country’s policies, instead, if he claims to be “a patriotic Chinese man” he should abide China or Hong Kong’s law on salary increases, if he needs to give it yearly as stated on their constitution, then he should do so, regardless of the employee’s nationality. He also called the Philippines as a nation of servants, because there are, according to him, 130,000 Filipino servants in Hong Kong he concluded therefore that the country is a nation of servants. In the Philippines there are also countless of Chinese tax evaders, intellectual property pirates, drug lords, prostitutes, gunrunners, illegal aliens and who knows what else, is it fair to label China then that it is a nation of “all of these”. I would like to see these 130,000 or so servants heed to Mr. “Cheap’s” advise of not flexing their muscle and let their Hong Kong local master do all the dirty works, is it possible for somebody be stupid and be stupid all over again, according to him he and his friends also declared a state of emergency in their homes and made their servants shout “China” like in the days of the cultural revolution, Instead of a state of emergency I think their in a state of ignorance, they should start shouting to their servants “teach us” because chances are these servants are more educated than their idiot masters, like his own, Louisa who holds a degree in international politics, she can give her own harsh lecture to “Cheap” that the cultural revolution is nothing more than just a time in Chinese history when their youth stopped going to school and started burning them and killing their parents at the same time, The baseline law that Manila passed is not a declaration of war or an insult against China like the way Mr. Cheap put it, it is simply practicing its sovereignty that it earn in 1898 long before Hong Kong earned its own from its master in 1987. In fact a debate is ongoing within it’s own political analyst. He must have nothing to write about and the deadline coming soon so he resorted to something that he would be sorry, A few days later he indeed made a public apology for what he wrote, he was pressured, 130,000 is a force that can make things happen. How can a patriotic Chinese man forget the colorful history of China and its servants, that trough the militancy of these servants the Peoples Republic of China was born.

Monday, May 25, 2015

Coogee Beach

Coogee Beach/Dunningham Park           
"You will always be a part of a happy memories"

Saturday, May 23, 2015

For You,,,




How can I tell you that I love you, I love you
But I can't think of right words to say
I long to tell you that I'm always thinking of you
I'm always thinking of you, but my words
Just blow away. just blow away
It always ends up to one thing, honey
And I can't think of right words to say
Wherever I am girl, I'm always walking with you
I'm always walking with you, but I look and you're not there
Whoever I'm with, I'm always, always talking to you
I'm always talking to you, and I'm sad that
You can't hear, sad that you can't hear
It always ends up to one thing, honey,
When I look and you're not there
I need to know you, need to feel my arms around you
Feel my arms around you, like a sea around a shore
And - each night and day I pray, and hope
That I might find you, and hope that I might
Find you, because heart's can do no more
It always ends up to one thing honey, still I kneel upon the floor

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Walang Hangang Paalam



Mahabang panahon na pala ang lumipas, 
hindi ko na namalayan ang mga pagbabagong naganap,
ang dating nariyan ay lumisan na at pinadpad sa kung saang sulok ng isipan,
ang dating matibay ay ginupo na rin ng panahon at sumuko sa mga pagsubok ng buhay, 
naririnig ko pa ang mga hikbi natin habang lumuluha sa takot na tayo ay magkalayo,
malaki na pala ang pinagbago, handa na tayong harapin ang araw ng paghihiwalay,
alala na lang ang lahat ng ikaw at ako sa puso nating nagmahal ng tunay,,, 




Huwag Kang Mangako Ng Kailanpaman

Huwag kang mangako ng kailanpaman
At baka ‘di ko mapapantayan
Huwag kang mangako ng habangbuhay
At baka di mo ako mahintay

Huwag kang mangusap ng kailanpaman
Kahit magdusa’t daigdig ma'y pasan
Di kailangang matinik na landas
Upang patunayang pagsuyo'y wagas

Sana nga bukas tulad ngayon
Ang ating pagsasama
Sana paglipas ng panahon
Di ka mag-iiba
Ngunit Wag mong sabihin ang kailanmanpaman
Tama na sa 'king ibigin minsan
Wag mong sabihin gano katagal
Tama nang gano mo ko kamahal

Ngunit Huwag kang mangako ng kailanpaman
At baka di ko matutumbasan
At kung ang ating landas mag sanga
Malayang damdamin ang magpapasya

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

ispeling???

sige tawa pa,,, talaga namang 'hard' diba???




Friday, May 15, 2015

A Letter For Boyet

Brad,
I wondered why you were in my dreams last night?
Its not September yet to be your birthday so i dont recall any reason why i should be dreaming of you. The scenes was a bit hazy but i suppose you stayed for a while and i can only remember one act, you tapped my shoulder and told me with a smile that everything will be alright, i asked how did you know?
How did you know that everything will be alright?  How did you know that i'am not alright?
we were suddenly singing a song together, but you know how dreams are, they are always out of the usual if not totally impossible because you were playing the guitar pretty good and we were singing a different song, i find it funny because we both know that you are a terrible guitar player. you cannot even play Fmajor7 properly, your fingers are like chicken feet when playing. I still got the smile on my lips when i opened my eyes, i turned on my computer and thought of reading the letter i wrote for you some years ago, my smile turned into a bigger smile then i wasn't smiling anymore, i was actually laughing when i realize that i wrote it 15may2009, exactly 6 years ago to date, i remember it was a weekend when i receive a call from Eman telling me that you are already gone, so soon brother, i thought we still have one song to sing together, that very moment i wrote a farewell letter for you (A Letter For Boyet), Now i wonder no more why you are in my dreams, thank you for making me feel "alright" and for the smile, i haven't had one in a while, i will be coming home soon, who knows maybe sooner than we though, tell big brother we will be singing "Blowing In The Wind" once again, it will be the loudest day in heaven and all the angels will be rocking with us, in the meantime just hang in there and enjoy the view I still have more people to meet, lesson to learn and monkey business to finish. i will see you soon and thank you for dropping by. -de du1sbn/15may2015



May 15, 2009
Dear Boyet,


It is always shocking to receive news of someone’s death, always untimely, unexpected and sometimes unbelievable; I was still around, hoping that one day we could see each other again and have a lengthy talk over a cup of coffee or a bottle of beer, just like the way we always do, until I receive the untimely, unexpected, unbelievable news,

We first met when we were kids, we fondly call you Boyet among other names we are not exactly the best of friends maybe because we are a part of a bigger group and we enjoy the company of everybody else, our circle of friends is a bit different we’d stay out late sitting on benches discussing matters, we are like old souls that incarnated in this lifetime all in the same place. But as the years went on we somehow found that we have the same interest on a lot of things or at least we see each other as an interesting person to be with, we were both attracted to the song “Blowing In The Wind” and the likes, thou your version is more like Bob Dylan and mine were Peter, Paul & Mary, we compliment each other, I play the guitar while you sing, I will do the listening while you do the talking, you conceptualize while I create, I have the questions and you have the answers.

I remember in one of our late night discussions, you shared to us what you read in the book “Beyond The Unknown” I went on looking for a copy but never had the chance to see or even found out if the book ever existed, but our series of story telling on the matter helped me overcome my fear of the unknown, you explained to me the reason behind my inferiority, where it is coming from and how to deal with it, even before I got to know what the hell inferiority is, you made me go places, do and say things that I would never had done on my own, but later I realize it jump started my battle against myself, you even introduce me to the Zodiacs when we were kids we found out that we have the same zodiac sign and our birthdates were just 10 days apart, I had a chance to see your place in the seminary when you were still studying to become a priest , I was also there when you graduated, again I am your regular visitor in your school when you were a teacher. We saw a concert together. We did a lot of other things.

After years of not seeing each other we met again eight years ago in your place in Cubao, as usual we discuss almost every topic possible from mustard seed to the heavens above, we were catching up on lost years you never failed to introduce me on what you have been up to lately like the books of Z.Sitchin and Astrology, you showed me your upper room filled with pictures of Sri Satya Sai Baba. Even while we were walking along the dim lighted street of your place we were still having a short topic discussion, time seems to be running out, like tomorrow will never come, that was the last time we saw each other and tomorrow never did come.

When we visited you in your wake the night before your mortal body were cremated I was subconsciously asking you, the one single question that we seem to ask after all those years “do we really continue to exist after we die” I saw your picture, the only one in the room, you were smiling back, and I think I got the answer,,, you never fail to have an answer to all my question as if we were having a conversation again just like the old times,,,

You became my mentor, my guide, a source of information, a friend, a compatriot, my astrological reader, my playmate when we were kids, my helpmate and companion in our journey towards my eventful meeting with the divine, I wish to meet you again in our next lifetime and continue the beautiful things that we have started.

Roberto Jr., Mario Ruel, Boyet, “kambing”
Thank you for a wonderful encounter I will miss everything about you, maybe it was meant for us see each other for the last time eight years ago, it was the most meaningful moment I had with you little did I know that you were actually saying goodbye when you shook my hand before I went, I still have the questions but you were not around with your answers,,, I will always remember you every time I hear this lines of the song “the answer my friend is blowing in the wind, the answer is blowing in the wind” goodbye, till’ we meet again,


 

"Blowing In The Wind" Bob Dylan and Peter, Paul & Mary



Wednesday, May 13, 2015

This Angel Has Flown

Cause this angel has flown away from me
Leaving me in drunken misery
I should have clipped her wings
And made her mine
For all eternity


Now this angel has flown away from me
I thought I had the strength to set her free
I did what I did because I love her so

orange and lemons /strike whilst the iron is hot/2005


Tuesday, May 12, 2015

I'd Rather

I'd rather live in the memories of being in love with you
than dwell in the grief and pain of loosing you.
I'd rather remember how much you meant to me
than hold on to your promises of forever and eternity.
I'd rather hear your whispers of sweet nothings on my ears
than listen to the things you said that brought me tears.
I'd rather drown in the sounds of your laughter
than feel the silence of my heart that could have been better.
I'd rather do the things we did all over again and cry
than feel sorry if we did not and wonder why.

Monday, May 11, 2015

honga naman.

everything will be okay in the end, if it's not okay, then it's not the end.



Sumisikat na ang araw at pumapasok sa aking bintana, 
tumatama sa aking mukha na tila ba mga kamay ng diyos na hinahaplos ang aking mga pisngi,  
Naalala ko tuloy ang haplos nya sa aking balat ng malalambot niyang daliri at pawisang mga kamay, 
mga simpleng bagay, pero nararamdaman ko ang pagmamahal, ang pag-ibig, ang init, ang lalim, ang ligaya na dulot nito, haplos na tila tumatagos hanggang buto, hanggang kaluluwa, sayang at alaala na lang ngayon, parang sikat din ng araw mainit pero panandaliian lang at lilipas din, pero di gaya ng araw na sa kinabukasan ay muling sisiskat, siya ay mawawala at di na muling makikita.

5 Things Your Soul Wants You To Know

the universe does send answers and/or explanations to our situations, i got one today,,, 
written by S. Bancarz for The Spirit Science.Net entitled "5 Things Your Soul Wants You To Know" 




When it comes to living life, we spend almost 100% of our time living as an avatar.  We have an ego, a personality, a history, preferences, dislikes, beliefs, opinions, cultural viewpoints, and experiences. These ingredients comprise our ‘person’ and our worldly sense of self.  But beneath all of these human ingredients lies one which is the foundation of all of them.  Without this ingredient, this avatar would not exist.  This ingredient is the soul.
The soul is timeless, eternal, and infinitely wise.  Our “intuition” is really just our soul whispering into the ear of our person.  You soul is not separate from you, but it will feel separate if you live life operating only from a personal or egoic level of consciousness.  Since the soul is the fountainhead of wisdom of guidance, it is always trying to communicate with us, especially in times where we are experiencing great suffering.
Here are 5 encouraging things your soul wants you to know:
1) You are meant to feel deeply
You are meant to REALLY feel.  Don’t hold back your tears, and don’t think it is wimpy, soft, or overly sensitive to expressive yourself.  It is healthy to feel deeply and to give yourself permission to experience the richness of human emotion.  Feel love.  Feel sadness.  Don’t walk in between as you daydream, really take the time to amerce yourself in the moment.  This is what life is all about.
2) You are here to experience life
 You are here to experience the fullness of life.  The ups and downs.  When all is said and done, you won’t care about your bank account, your material possessions, or the empty house you leave behind.  All you will care about is whether or not you took the time to appreciate the miracle of life.  You are alive.  Nobody knows why the universe exists, how it got here, or why consciousness exists, but here you are as a product of this grand mystery. Have fun.  Live life.  It’s too short of a journey to not appreciate the experiences, relationships, and memories you have here.
3) You are divine and non-physical
You are not the body you live in.  You are ultimately that which is aware of the body and the mind.  You are ultimately the canvas on which the ego is painted, and when you die you shed your “self”.  You are eternal, spaceless, timeless, and immaterial.  You are a spiritual being pretending to be human for a little while.  Whoever told you that you are a human being was lying to you.  You live in a human body, but you are not human.  Never forget this.  A great deal of suffering can be prevented by allowing yourself to connect with your own divinity.
4) Death is an illusion
You never die.  How can you die when there is no such thing as death?  There is only transition between dimensions.  YOU, as an individuated fragment of consciousness, can never be destroyed.  There is nothing to fear, because there is nothing to lose.  When your physical body dies, you become more of what you are, not less.
5) You are loved
You are infinitely loved by the Universe and that which lies beyond.  You may not be able to feel it right now, but on the other side of physical reality lies a host of spiritual family members and friends that are waiting to greet you.  You have Guides and Angels that are your care takers in this life and the next.  The Creator loves you more than you could know, for it is The Creator that is ultimately experiencing Itself as an individual through you.  You are more than just loved, you are Love itself.

In times where we feel discouraged, hopeless, meaningless, or insignificant, it is usually because we have forgotten what and who we truly are.  We are just visitors passing through.  If you wish to know through experience what your soul wants you to know, listen to your intuition.  It is literally the navigation system your soul has installed into your avatar. Meditate, get still, and reconnect with the part of you that is already everything you could hope to be.

Friday, May 8, 2015

Here Today

And if I said,
I really knew you well what would your answer be?
If you were here today

Well knowing you,
You'd probably laugh and say that we were worlds apart.
If you were here today

But as for me,
I still remember how it was before,
And I am holding back the tears no more
I love you, 

What about the time we met?
Well, I suppose that you could say that we were playing hard to get.
Didn't understand a thing, But we could always sing.

What about the night we cried,
Because there was no reasons left to keep it all inside?
Never understood a word, But you were always there 
with a smile.

And if I say, I really loved you and was glad you came along.
If you were here today.
for you were in my song
here today.


paul mccartney/ tug of war 1982






Thursday, May 7, 2015




"ma belle sont des mots qui vont très bien ensemble,
très bien ensemble.
 je t'aime,,,"

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

The Love I Found In You


Damdaming Nakabitin


Ang mga munting bagay na iyong ibinigay
Ay lagi kong hawak sa aking mga kamay
Sa pamamagitan nila ikaw ay nabubuhay
Wala nang mas mahalaga sa ala-alang taglay

Ginuguhit ng ulap ang maamo mong mukha
Sumasabay sa hangin ang iyong mga tawa
Ang pumapatak na ulan parang agos ng luha
Luha ng pagmamahal na kumakatok sa bintana



Ang naiwang ala-ala ay lagi kong nakikita
Sa lahat ng bagay na aking ginagawa
Damdaming nakabitin na naghihintay pa rin
Laging nakaabang sa iyong pagdating

Kung nasaan ka man ay nais kong ipaalam
Na ang pag-mahal sa iyo ay akin ng natutunan
Ang iyong kaligtasan ay lagi kong panambitan
At iyong pagbalik ay lagi kong inaasam.

mike pillora jr./asin /himig ng lahi 1983

Wednesday, April 29, 2015




The sound of cello and piano playing 
are all too much for me to hear to overcome this loneliness and grief,
for several weeks now i have been seeing things that reminds me of you,
your name, birth date, places we've been together, things i use to see when i had you in mind,
or anything associated with you,
maybe i was just thinking a lot about you lately, i'am still and maybe i will for a long time,
but the sad part is i'am also seeing the word "goodbye" one after the other,
as if the universe is telling me to let go,
we have already said our goodbyes to each other many times before but it never happened, 
we were never serious about letting each other go, 
we know we will never be alright without each other, 
but never like today,,,
today is a sad reminder that no matter how wonderful we are together 
wonderful things can also end somewhere along the way
still i will never say goodbye, 
i'am not letting you go,
i will just wait untill  it happens,
till then i will not know that i will never see you again,,, ever again,,,

Move on?
i can move on,
i can try to forget everything, 
i can pretend, 
i can escape,
i can make myself busy to forget,
but no matter what i can do i still end up empty and thinking about you,
i will have to accept the fact that my heart longs to be near you, 
in you,,,  for you,,,  beside you,,, 
with you,
no matter how i try to smile and laugh, i know, i can never be as happy as i was with you, 
no matter how each day goes by, when i'm alone i will always be missing you
i do not wish to move on, to go anywhere else, i'am exactly where i wanted to be, 
i'am home, i'am at peace with myself, i'am complete,
 i'am a lot better than before, i'am all of it and more
because i'am in love with you,,,
yes, i'am very much in love with you,
even if you are not here with me, 
even if you are somewhere with someone, 
even if we do not talk or see each other anymore,
even if you forget that once we made memories together, 
even if things didn't went forever, 
you may have lost me but i will never loose you, 
i will always have you here with me, 
i have been there and all around, i have been up and went down but when i met you,
i found rest when i found you.

It is over,,,
 we cannot be what we are before,
we are friends or lovers no more,
i cannot hold your hand like this anymore but my heart will always hold you close
my lips will always be kissing you 
we will always be embracing each other closely
we are connected, we feel each other at some level,
 we are meant to be together
if not here, if not now, somewhere we will, somehow,
we are making love tenderly, endlessly, passionately,
yes we do, close your eyes and you will know, you will feel,
we make love like we never did with anyone before,
and we will never do with anyone anymore.

I'am sorry for all the pains and tears, for the same loneliness and grief you went through, 
i couldn't have done any better, i have to go through all of it, 
maybe i did a little bit more or a little bit less but i have to,
maybe you've waited a little bit long or a little too soon but you held on, 
i have to feel how cold my heart was to understand how i miss the warmth of your love, 
i have to suffer the same way you did to understand how painful it was to be left alone for granted, 
i went away only to find myself running back to you, missing you and longing for your embrace, 
i remember all the times we kiss, the times we hug, 
the times we held our hands and every minute of every time we made love, 
i will take it all with me, in my heart and in my soul, 
i know it's a bit late now to tell you this, 
i only have less time to spend, 
but if i could, i will and always would spend the rest of it with you,,, 
i miss you,
I LOVE YOU,,,

Not A Day Goes By That I Don't Think Of You,,,

got a picture of you i carry in my heart
close my eyes to see it when the world gets dark
got a memory of you i carry in my soul
i wrap it close around me when the nights gets cold
i still wait for the phone in the middle of the night
thinking you might call me if your dreams don't turn out right
and it still amazes me that i lie here in the dark
wishing you we're next to me with your head against my heart
and if you ask me how i'm doing id say just fine
but the truth is baby, if you could read my mind
not a day goes by that i don't think of you
after all this time you're still with me it's true
somehow you remain locked so deep inside
minutes turn to hours and the hours to days
seems it's been forever that i felt this way,,,


"When you are happy you appriciate the music
but when you are sad and lonely you appreciate the lyrics"

Monday, April 27, 2015

Simply Jessie



And they could never be
what you are to me,,,



Friday, April 24, 2015


Oo nga gitara,,,, 
mabuti pa ang relasyon ko sa aking gitara walang komplikasyon, walang inaalala, 
pwede lahat, walang prinsipyong ini-ingatan, pwedeng yakapin hawakan at maangkin ano mang oras kahit kailan kahit saan pwede kong makasam



dear guitar, 
thank you for being there when nobody else was.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Eternal Vow

take this entity who's presently named Katherine in this lifetime, 
the creation the elders has sent me 
to be my companion and help mate in my journey from here to eternity, 
i take her as my sister or brother, 
as my parent or child, as my friend or lover, 
as a he or a she, 
as the other half of me, 
as i have done years before or 
as i will do a thousand years more, 
i take her as he would have take me. 
with her i will discover things in me with all its grandeur and beauty, 
i would fall in love as i have before, 
with her, 
with him, 
whoever he may be, 
whereever she may be, 
whenever it could be, 
we see happiness in spite of the circumstance, 
we are together in spite of the distance, 
we seek each each other in spite of the situation, 
we are here and we are there,
we are everywhere, 
our love takes us anywhere.

Friday, April 17, 2015

My One And Only Wishart

having you in my life makes my half complete
a smile that i can't give to anyone , because only you can have it
tears in my eyes that only you can wipe
words from my heart that only you can hear
loving you is not so easy
but my only promise to my one and only "wishart"
i will never ever give up on you
"i will love you 'till eternity"


 


I will hold on to your promises,,, 
that you will never give up on me,,, that you will love me 'till eternity,,, 
i will hold on just like the way you held on me in spite of all the pain that you went through, 
the tears and the heartache, 
you held on even when my heart grew cold for a while,,,
you held on when i was not there to see your smiles,,,
you held on when i was not there to wipe your tears away,,,
i will always be here waiting for you to come home,,, 
you will always be my one and only "wishart"
 and my heart will always stay very much in love with you,,, 





Monday, April 13, 2015

a song for you,,,

"i thought that i can live without you
i really thought that i was strong
but now you're gone im not half as strong
i never knew that life could fade away
a little bit more each day
without you im twice a fool
i never saw it happening to me
i was blinded by my dreams of being free
,,, free from love
i never knew how much i missed you
i never knew i had to give to you
to keep you here now i need you here
maybe if i say i'm sorry
maybe you would never believe me
and i wont blame you i wasn't good to you
believe when i say im sorry
we've got to find a way of starting all over
cause its not over for me and you"


just when you least expect it you come across songs that seems to speak from what is in your heart








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